And all around the nation
Wont you stay with me tonight cuz I'm running out of fight and the pageantry is such a bore
And the presents are in place but I'd rather eat some mace cuz the eggnog always makes me sick
You know how the story goes
You've seen it all before
That man is so obese that he can't get out the door
I'm begging for some action
And the ringing in my ears is the sound of Christmas cheer
Cuz they knocked me screaming overboard