How d'you do,
I see you've met my faithful handyman,
He's just a little brought down because when you knocked,
He thought you were the candyman,
Don't get strung out by the way that I look,
Don't judge a book by its cover,
I'm not much of a man by the light of day,
But by night I'm one hell of a lover,
I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania,
So let me show you around,
Maybe play you a sound,
You look like you're both pretty groovy,
Or if you want something visual,
That's not too abysmal,
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie,
Brad: «I'm glad we caught you at home, could we use your phone?
We're both in a bit of a hurry.
We'll just say where we are, then go back to the car
We don't want to be any worry.»
So you got caught with a flat, well, how about that?
Well babies, don't you panic,
By the light of the night when it all seems alright,
I'll get you a satanic mechanic,
I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania,
So why don't you stay for the night? Or maybe a bite?
I could show you my favourite obsession,
I've been making a man with blond hair and a tan,
And he's good for relieving my tension,
I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania,
So come up to the lab. And see what's on the slab,
I see you shiver with antici... pation!
But maybe the rain isn't really to blame,
So I'll remove the cause, but not the symptom.